Alt-Right Bros are Beating Starbucks into Submission

Esquire takes a snarky look at the “My name is Trump” movement.

Like stupid liberals they don’t get it or they pretend they don’t.


Starbucks is often the subject of conservative protesters who view it as the international symbol of smug liberalism. First, there was the gun-totin’, freedom-lovin’ preacherman who kicked off the 2015 War on Christmas by “tricking” the baristas at his local outpost with a devious plot: He told them his name was “Merry Christmas,” and they wrote it on his cup. This was to protest the company’s decision to remove “Merry Christmas” from the cups—the cups never said Merry Christmas—and to help that guy go viral.

Anyway, Starbucks is back in the crosshairs again today. Another Internet-famous conservative, a Trump supporter with the Twitter handle @bakedalaska, went to his local store and got them to write the president-elect’s name on the cup

It was not immediately clear what the point here was. According to CNN, this is part of a “movement” by Trump supporters “to protest what they view as political and anti-white discrimination” after a video surfaced of a white Trump supporter yelling at a barista.

The question is, why do these people who are mad at Starbucks always go to the nearest Starbucks to give the corporation their money? Are the mocha lattes just too good to give up?

Anyway, Mr. Alaska has since clarified it was NOT a protest, it was a “statement”:

Just wait until he finds out the beans aren’t made in America.

Don’t forget this guy:

We’re sticking it to Starbucks because it FEELS SO GOOD to dump on liberal retards whose tyrannical mindset is all about shutting us up and making us go away.

3 thoughts on “Alt-Right Bros are Beating Starbucks into Submission

  1. I’ve been to Starbucks once and once was enough. Way too expensive. Hubby and I prefer to support our local independent coffee shop.

    My sister and brother-in-law don’t go very often any more. They say the music is so loud it’s difficult to carry on a conversation. Other customers, as well as the management agreed but could not/would not turn down the volume because it was against corporate policy. Can you believe it? They’re required to keep the music loud. I suppose they don’t want their customers to get too comfortable and stay too long.

  2. I go in coffee line so as to correct the server. The server always picks the cup up by placing fingers on the brim of the cup. I loudly exclaim: DO NOT PUT YOUR HANDS ON THE BRIM OF THAT CUO. I HAVE NI IDEA WHERE YOUR HANDS HAVE BEEN. I DO KNOW THAT YOU HANDLE MONEY FROM HOMOSEXUALS! I NO LONGER WANT ANYTHING FROM HERE!
    I then look long and stern at everyone in line behind me and those who are sitting and already sipping the coffee. Few appreciate what I just did for them. So my question is: why are you at Starbucks to begin with? I had a mission.:)

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